An interview with a Wookiee
Earlier this week, I sat down with my bobblehead Chewbacca for a little one-on-one chat. As you probably already know, I’m a big fan of the Giant Walking Carpet. I think it was egged on by the fact that my roommate started calling me Chewbacca after I returned home from Philmont.
I’ve even “met” Chewbacca on a couple occasions. OK. I didn’t really meet him. I just got to stand really close to some Chewbacca costumes that had been used in the films. That counts for something. I’d love to meet Peter Mayhew someday, though. Maybe I should add that to my list of 100-ish Things I Want to Do Before I Die.
With all that being said, it really shouldn’t be a surprise that I have a Chewbacca bobblehead sitting at my workspace. Should it?
Bobblehead Chewie and I sat down for our interview one cold morning this past week. Here’s how our conversation went…
Me: Thanks for taking the time to talk with me this morning. We’ve known each other for quite a while now. Right?
Bobblehead Chewie: Well, you should know.
Me: You were the first thing I bought and brought in to sit on my desk after I started working at Slingshot. That’s been close to two years. That sounds like a pretty decent amount of time.
Bobblehead Chewie: Whatever you say.
Me: That’s an interesting response.
Bobblehead Chewie: Good.
Me: What’s your deal? Who peed in your Wheaties this morning?
Me: Um…That was almost three years ago. It’s been a while.
Bobblehead Chewie: Whatever. He thinks he runs this desk. He still brags about how he threw that Ninja Turtle off his perch. And that was months ago! He keeps saying that makes him King of the Hill.
Me: That wasn’t even my Turtle.
Bobblehead Chewie: It doesn’t matter! He’s getting out of control and you need to stop him before I rip his arms out of his sockets.
Me: Heh. That would be fun to watch. Do you think we could set up some kind of pay-per-view broadcast of the epic Wookiee on Wookiee duel?
Bobblehead Chewie: Whatever.
Me: OK. You’re right. He’s getting a little too big for his britches. I’ve removed him from the situation and put him in a coffee mug. He’ll be in time out for a while. Like a three year old. Are you happy now?
Bobblehead Chewie: Well….
Me: Oh, what else is wrong?
Bobblehead Chewie: It’s that stupid Christmas Jawa.
Me: Now wait a second. He’s on the other side of the desk. He’s about as far away as he can be from you.
Bobblehead Chewie: I know. But he kind of stinks like a dead Hutt. And his eyes are so spooky. It’s like they glow in the dark. They give me nightmares when I sleep. And it’s not like I get to sleep for very long. Have you heard him sing? It’s absolutely dreadful. All he sings is Christmas songs. Off key. And he does it all. night. long.
Me: Well, you’re just going to have to make the most of it. Christmas is only a few weeks away. Then he’ll be put back in the box for another 11 months.
Me: I think he comes down with a horrible case of cabin fever when he’s in that storage box. It just takes him a while to get all of his energy out of his system.
Bobblehead Chewie: I get that. I really do. But he’s grating on everyone’s last nerve.
Me: Sorry. Y’all are just going to have to deal with it.
Bobblehead Chewie: You know, maybe you have too many Star Wars trinkets at your desk. Have you ever thought of putting some of them away?
Me: You know, you’re right! Maybe I should start by putting you away….
Bobblehead Chewie: No. I see your point. I think you have just the right amount. Now, where were we with this interview? Didn’t you have a question for me?
Me: I think it’s safe to say that this interview is over. You’ve said quite enough already.