This is everything I can tell you about Stevie Shoot a Three Pointer

Stevie Shoot a Three Pointer

Back in 1987, as the Hoosiers were poised to make their national championship run, Evansville’s own 96 STO aired a song recorded by Furry Head and the Favorites called Stevie Shoot a Three Pointer. I only heard it a few times on the radio, but I never forgot it. And ever since I wrote about this song some eight years ago, I’ve been on a mission to find a digital copy of this song online.

I haven’t been able to find one.

I did find a copy once. But it disappeared soon after that. Even the Wayback Machine couldn’t help. So my mission has resumed. I know a lot of people have stumbled upon my blog, looking for Stevie Shoot a Three Pointer. And I don’t blame them. Because it’s probably the best parody song ever. I don’t want to disappoint anyone. So I’m on my mission again.

I’ve even emailed and tweeted the fine folks at 96 STO to see if they can be any help.

No luck so far.

I know this song is a memorable one for anyone who lived in or around the state of Indiana during the Hoosiers’ 1987 tournament run. It was a big deal. Even caused a little bit of controversy. The NCAA said they couldn’t use players’ names. If they did use players’ names, they would have to rule those players ineligible for the national championship game, because a commercial enterprise using a player’s name would negatively influence their amateur status.

Indiana's banners hanging at Assembly Hall

The station had the greatest response ever. “OK,” they said, “If you’re going to make players ineligible because we’re using their names, we’re going to make a song about each and every Syracuse player.”

I guess the NCAA backed off because the song kept playing on the airwaves.

I’m sure you found this page because you are looking for a recording of Stevie Shoot a Three Pointer. I’m sorry you won’t find it here. Yet. Maybe together we can track it down and make the world a much better place?

If you have any leads, please contact me.

In the meantime, here are the lyrics to Stevie, Shoot a Three Pointer (as best as I can tell):

Sung to the tune of The Letter 
(click here if you need to hear the original)

Get me a ticket for an aeroplane.
Got to see the Hoosiers win another game.
The other guys will lose
Scorin’ two by twos.
Stevie, shoot a three pointer

What do you mean his foot was on the line?

I don’t care what other teams you’ve got to play.
You’re gonna stomp on them, anyway.
Come on, Bobby Knight,
Throw some chairs tonight.
And Stevie, shoot a three pointer.

Hey are you a referee or a zebra?

Stevie shoot a three pointer
It’s so easy, you know
You can do it all day.

Shoot from 20 and you score.
Next year, make it 24.
That’s NBA
Good luck in the draft.
Anyway…

I don’t care how much money I got to spend.
Got to be there to see those Hoosiers win.
Getting extra score
From that sign upon the floor
Stevie, shoot a three pointer.

What? Forty five seconds? Hey, ref! When was the last time your offense lasted 45 seconds?

Anyway…

I don’t care how much money I got to spend.
Can’t stand to look at Dick Enberg again.
If you snooze you lose.
Don’t score two by twos.
Stevie, shoot a three pointer.

Lose the ball? Hey, ref! Lose this!

Stevie, shoot a three pointer
Everyone in the joint here
Is screaming “S A!”
Those are your initials, man

Steve, these seats have lots of luck
I just spent 300 bucks.
That’s a week’s pay!
Wait till my wife finds out

Anyway…

I don’t care how much money I’ve got to spend,
Can’t stand to look at Dick Enberg again.
If you snooze you lose.
Don’t score two by twos.
Stevie, shoot a three pointer.

Go, Stevie, shoot a three pointer.

 

So long, Knight.

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Bobby Knight

That’s right. I just referred to The General, former Coach Bob Knight, by just his last name. It’s quite daring of me to do so as I sit at my laptop at home. If I called him by his last name while standing face to face, I’d be in trouble. He’d probably allegedly grab my arm and inform me how I should address him.

I’m addressing him because it’s finally time to say what I’ve been thinking for a long time. Hopefully, he wouldn’t choke me when I say this.

“So long, Knight.”

I was a huge fan of Bob Knight’s when he coached at Indiana. I celebrated when he slammed the phone during the NCAA tournament game. While I was confused when he took his Indiana team off the floor in the middle of the game against the Soviets, I was confident he knew what he was doing. I marveled at the plan The General had put into place in order to neutralize Shaq when the Hoosiers took on LSU in the tournament. Oh, and Ivan Renko? Genius. Pure genius. Continue reading “So long, Knight.”

Father’s Day ideas for an Indiana fan

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In 49 states, it’s just basketball. But this is Indiana. We take basketball (and other sports) pretty seriously. And if your dad is a fan of Indiana like I am, you might be wondering what to get for him this Father’s Day.

I’m sure he’s going to love one of these suggestions.


Here are 16 Father’s Day ideas for the Indiana fan in your life:

Title Fathers Day Gift Guide - Indiana

Continue reading “Father’s Day ideas for an Indiana fan”

Dear Indiana Basketball,

I just have one request for the Cream and Crimson today. And I think it’s a pretty common request from basketball fans around the country: Beat Kentucky.

So I crafted a well-reasoned, passionate, and motivating post for the Hoosiers squad as they take the floor today.

Beat Kentucky

I don’t think I’m asking too much.

Do it for Indiana. Do it for the glory of old IU (“IU!“).

Do it for the fans.

Do it for yourselves.

Do it for your coach.

Do it for me.

Do it for the rest of college basketball. I’m pretty sure they’ll be joining us in cheering for you. You’re bringing the world together like few other organizations can.

And my kids. Don’t forget about my kids. In fact…

Do it for the children! ALL of them!

Do it for world peace. And puppies. You like puppies, don’t you? They’ll be happy if you win. Do it for them. And rainbows. And sugar plumb fairies.

Just get the job done. Please. Pretty please. With whipped cream and a cherry and chocolate sprinkles on top. Unless you like rainbow sprinkles. Then we’ll top it with rainbow sprinkles.

And thank you.

Go Hoosiers!
Beat Kentucky!

It’s just the right thing to do.

No pressure. Just have fun. And do your best. Because, as I keep telling my kids, it’s important to do your best and have fun. That’s the real reason we play sports. So play your hearts out today.

Oh, and beat Kentucky. That is all.